Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend left me for spending my own money. I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff, but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute, she leaves me.
Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing, and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dad's pants. Little Johnny says, "That explains what the lady next door was doing."
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
I'm worth something, I got a barcode on my arm!
What did the Chinese girl say when she had a baby?
"Sum ting wong."
I was a sit-down comedian, then I tried to stand up. I fell.
I wished I stayed in the wheelchair.
When you're depressed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)
If abortion is murder, is jerking off genocide?
Two baked beans traveled around Australia.
They both ended up in Cairns.
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
I lost my driver's license today. I hit my ex with my car.
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.
Who needs April 1st if your whole life is already a lie?
Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?
Parent's signature: ___________
If you're bored, joke about an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Segma says, "32!"
Ligma Says, "And?"
Segma says, "Anding deez balls to your mouth."
Q. What's a bulimic's favorite movie?
A. The Purge.
gay fish.