Worst Jokes Ever
Q: How can you tell the sun is a boy?
A: It rises every morning.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I only do anal, I thought you knew.
I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I can't help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What game hurts you the more stages you survive?
Cancer.
How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just Juan.
The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals: a hacker, a rapist, a serial killer, and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial killer decides that she wants to change, but when she sees a knife she just can’t help it. She bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist gets teleported back to prison.
It isn't rap music if it isn't about rape.
A wild Iceberg appears. Go Titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt. The attack misses. Titanic faints.
What kind of coffee do they serve at funerals?
Burial grounds.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
I, for one, wish Donald Trump was President again. It's been a while since we had a presidential assassination.
A Christian Missionary walks up to some people and says, "Come! Meet Jesus!"
One of the guys takes out a knife and says, "You first."
Mom said dad had the best pullout game... now I'm an uncle.
What's the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?
You can shut the book up.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
I hate my life.
In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the 'Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last.
I had a goldfish that could break dance on the carpet... but only for, like, twenty seconds and only once.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.