Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.
Don't be scared of skeletons.
They don't have the guts for murder.
People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
A gay guy and a trucker get in a car crash.
The gay guy says, "Somebody call the police! This man just rammed into me!"
The trucker says, "What the fuck did you just say, fucker? Get over here, I'm gonna wreck your ass!"
The gay man then says, "It's okay, everybody, don't call the police! He wants to negotiate."
Why did the orphan go to church?
It was because he was looking for someone to call "Father."
Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!
What does the suicidal person say on New Years?
"New year, no me."
A man and woman were having sex. After they were done, the man asks the woman, "Are you a nurse?" The woman answers, "Yes. How did you know?" The man replies, "Because you took care of me so well." Then the woman asks the man, "Are you an anesthesiologist?" He says proudly, "Yes. How do you know?" The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."
A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"
I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣
How do rappers keep themselves clean?
They drop SOAP BARS.
What’s the difference between the way you watch porn and I watch porn?
The windows we look through.
Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?
He took away their ottoman!
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
What instrument can a skeleton not play? An organ!
What instrument can a skeleton play? A Trombone!