Worst Jokes Ever
I remember when I was a kid, I thought the world used to be colorless.
I was kinda right. They used to not let colors in a lot of areas.
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.
The doctor told me I had aids. I said, "It's your fault, sister."
Why can't Stephen Hawking be a Rocket League car? Because he can't jump for an aerial.
A man is with his friend in a bar.
The friend, out of the blue, asks, "Hey, what's your body count?"
Nervous, the man looks away.
The friend then says, "I'm talking about sex."
The man then turns back and mumbles, "Oh... I thought you saw inside the basement..."
"Wait, wha..."
"What?"
I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.
Yo mama is so ugly she's the reason why Batman fights crime at night.
While undressing a woman, she told me she has AIDS. I told her she can't catch it twice, but she still kept screaming.
Two fish are in a tank. One says, "You man the guns, I'll drive!"
Why can't college students take exams at the zoo?
Too many cheetahs!
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
Bro's hair looks like Buzz Lightyear, going to infinity and beyond!
Roses are red, that much is true. But violets are purple, not fucking blue.
What starts with M and ends with carriage?
This joke never gets old, but then again neither does the baby.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
A war isn’t about who is right, it’s about who is left!
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."
School is like a boner. It's long and hard unless you're Asian.