Worst Jokes Ever
I can't handle these puns...
But I can HAND you some puns!
Budum tiss!
Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.
Dear NASA, your mom thought I was big enough.
–Pluto.
Why don't nurses like giving old people baths or showers?
Because they don't want their vegetables to get soggy.
Only if Africans knew about condoms, so many mosquitoes wouldn't die of AIDS.
How did the hamburger know he needed new pants?
His buns were too tight.
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
How do you get "Dick" from Richard?
Ask him nicely.
1273 please kill me, everyone hates me.
Foi o Chuck Norris que fez o parto da sua mãe.
Marriage is like buying a car. You see one that you like and then you buy it. But over the years, it gets older, rusty, and certain parts stop working.
Then you walk into a dealership and look at all the new ones and you're still stuck with the old one. You look over and go, "But I just wanna sit in it. Just once. It's even got leather interior, it's chrome, it doesn't even have oil or gas leaks! And it doesn't squeak!"
My dad never came back with the milk. My mom told me he's in the army.
What's the different when a little boy drops in Japan then and now?
When a little boy falls today he gets back up. But then everyone fell and never came back up.
What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?
"Two wongs don’t make a white."
I have a paso.
There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.
I found this at school.
Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.
Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!
Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!