Worst Jokes Ever
Wanna hear a mean joke?
My life.
A man found out that he was going to die.
A German doctor comes in and says "you have 10 more". The man yells out "10 WHAT!! DAYS!!!! WEEKS!!!". And the doctor says "No seconds". And the man says "9 SECONDS!!!" And the doctor says "Nein. Ten seconds". He asked "How many seconds do I have to live 10, 9 , or...?"
Then he died and learned how to say no in German....
Puns, that's how I roll.
What do you call high Mexicans?
Baked beans ;)
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
Deez nuts!
GOT EEMMMMMMMM!
The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!
What do you call a person?
A person.
Why did Adam commit suicide? Andy went through the back door.
Why did Aaron slit his wrists?
Because it's him.
You all suck!
What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!
Yo mama so fat,
She doesn't fit in a Titan's mouth.
(Attack on Titan; Shingeki no Kyojin)
Donald Trump.
What's the difference between Black and White people?
Blacks don't need N-Word Passes.
[God creating Asians] “Alright, and the design is finished, see our new model, the Asian. It has no hair at all.”
Angel asks, “Does it eat normal food?”
God replies, “(chuckling) Oh no, not at all.”
If you hate America, I don't like you :)
Linda and Peter are having sex. Peter goes in and out hard then fast and then begins to taste her tits. Finally, he moves down to the vagina and eats her hard. His rouge is inside her body, lolling around. He fucks her hard again and his dick slicks up her vagina. The entire time she is moaning and begging for more.
When Linda cums on his penis she begins to lick his balls hard. Peter begins moaning too saying, "Linda, you're just as amazing at fucking as your sister."
My boyfriend entered a retarded contest, but they said no because they don’t allow perfectionists.
Why was 10 so scared? Because he was in the middle of 9/11.