Worst Jokes Ever
Why was 7 afraid of 6?
Because 6 8 7.
Daughter: Where was I born?
Dad: Alabama.
Daughter: That is nice.
Mum: We have never been to Alabama.
Dad: RUN!
Girl: Mom, meet my boyfriend.
Mom: Meet my boyfriend.
Girl's boyfriend: Dad, is that you? Are you back from the supermarket with milk?
Mom's boyfriend: Uh, gtg.
How can you tell if a Polish woman is on the rag? One of her socks is missing!
What danger does this put them in? Toxic Sock Syndrome!
Grandma, I can’t believe I have Alzheimer’s.
One second later, Well at least I don’t have Alzheimer’s.
Stephen Hawking's death was because he lost WiFi connection.
When a kindergarten teacher asks a kid to sing the alphabet, he said "ab3defg." The teacher said, "Do you like 3D?" He said, "Yeah." The teacher yelled, "Okay, do you have a 3DS?" He said yes. The teacher goes into his bag and says, "Say ABCs or your 3DS will be destroyed." He says, "ab3defghijlmnopqrs." "Oh, he learned well." The teacher threw the 3DS out the window. The kid gets it, and it still works. Then he googles ABCs. It goes to YouTube and says, "abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz." The teacher is proud of the 3DS. The class went home telling parents.
What did the skeleton say when he fell on his funny bone? He laughed!
Say "Mike Wizowski" fast to a teenager and I will get you $100000000000.
We were discussing cows in a lesson. I asked my teacher why she was one.
Where do Eagles send their children to study?
The Alpha birds.
What did the rainbow say to the other rainbow?
Nothing, it was feeling blue.
What has 2 wheels and screams? A disabled [person] I dropkicked down the stairs.
Have you heard of deez nuts?
Me: Do you know a funny joke?
Friend: Yes, you.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
What do Hiroshima and Nagasaki share in common with balls?
They both drop.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I did not say banana? Ha ha!
What did the fish say when he got to the dam?
"Dam water."
"Dam!"