Worst Jokes Ever
Your mama is so ugly, she tried summoning Candyman, but he refused to come!
Guy: "Can I tell you a joke?"
Spiderman: "Yes."
Guy: "You only have 11 months on your calendar."
Spiderman: "Why?"
Guy: *holds up knife* "Because I murdered May."
Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.
Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?
Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.
He sing, he dance, he he.
My mom asked me if I was okay, so I replied, "I will be," and jumped out the window!
Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.
What did one copper say to the other? C U.
Which is Ronaldo's favorite son, Matteo or Cristiano Junior?
Neither. His favorite is San Marino, perfect for stat-padding with tap-ins and penalties!
Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
What’s something you can say about vacation, but not about your girlfriend?
Next time I’m bringing all my friends.
I used to think that I had a Japanese friend, but it was just my imagi-asian.
What's an orphan's least favorite game?
Baseball because they can't find home plate.
What sucks about disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
What do you call a movie at Bill Cosby’s house?
Netflix and pill.
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
Breaking news: Man with Alzheimer's forgets he's blind and recovers from visual impairment.