Worst Jokes Ever
Cats are like onions; when I cut them, I cry.
Yo mama is so ugly, she turned a knife into a statue.
Who is Stephen Hawking?
Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
My pencil sharpener broke, so now my pencil is pointless.
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
What does a Chinese machine gun sound like? "ching chong ching chong tang tang."
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
What is black and at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking's after a fire.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His wife forgot to plug his wheelchair into the wall.
A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.
What does the ocean do to its friends?
It waves.
(*Sorry I wasn't making any jokes for a while, I was getting sick of this thing.*)
I ran out of bras, so I wore...
My grandma's underpants!
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that's just been raped.
What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of them is a police officer.
What is a "dad?"
A kid walks into the classroom on time.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.