Worst Jokes Ever
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
Hippity hoppity, you are no one's property.
A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"
The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
What is Jesus's favorite exercise? Cross fit.
What's the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman?
Batman returns.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone.
Me and my friends are going to create a Steps tribute band. We are all in wheelchairs, so we are going to be called "Ramps."
What is a cow that's good at math good for?
Meat pie.
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
Me: Joe left today.
Orphan: Who's Joe?
Me: Joe mama!
I harvested indigo to make dye. I made the dye. I made a number dye. I dyed the dye. I rolled the dye. It made me die.
The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.
When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.
Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?
Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?
Teacher, the one sucking it?
Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.
The belt broke.
What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.
I went up the temp girl and slapped her tests and said-
"I like ya cut, G."