Worst Jokes Ever
What do a gay man and an ambulance have in common?
They both take it in the back and go “whoot whoot.”
Roses are red, Get on the ground, Gimme your stuff, Get ready to drown!
School shooting: Happens.
Foreign Exchange Student: Starts sobbing under desk.
American Student: "First time?"
I have a huge thought: if Satan punishes people who are bad, doesn't that make him good?
When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.
But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!
Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day.
Why can't orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature.
What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan? The apples get picked.
Q: What's the best way to carve wood?
A: Whittle by whittle.
My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
What's a lesbian's favorite weapon?
A finger gun.
Walk up to an emo and say, "I like your cuts G."
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
What's black and white and red all over? An American School.
Why are orphans always famous?
Because they say, "Go big or go home," and orphans only have one option.
I figure it's ok to hit orphans.
What are they gonna do? Go tell their parents?
What meds do snakes with ADHD take?
Adder-all.
A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”