Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to go to KFC.
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
What was the name of the Mexican that lost his car?
Carlos.
Your forehead is so big, a whole jungle grew on it.
Emos do take shots of themselves... not with a camera, though.
Royal aka ZEPHYR gets cucked daily by Tyrone.
ZEPHYR watches Tyrone give his wife the genes he could never give her. What a loser.
Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything, and Person #2 orders a chili.
Person #1: “Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?”
Person #2: “No, you can have it.”
Person #1: “Ok, thanks...”
Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.
Person #2: “That’s about as far as I got too!”
If a blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who would hit the ground first?
The brunette, because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 10 fingers, the middle ones are for you.
My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting. "Mom! You and Dad need to stop!"
They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.
What do orphans call family pictures?
A selfie.
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
Who did the cow want to hang with?
The udders.
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
What did the plane say to the tower?
"Give me a kiss."
An officer confronts two congressmen.
He informs them, \"I’m looking for a couple of child molesters.\"
The two look at each other, turn to the officer and exclaim, \"Sure! We’ll do it!\"
Three nuns die in a car crash, but they all make it to heaven. They're standing at the pearly gates, and Saint Peter says to them, "Don't worry, you're going to get in, but first I need you to answer these questions."
He asks the first nun, "What was the name of the first woman?" The nun says, "Eve." Saint Peter says, "Go on in."
Then he asks the second nun, "Where did Adam and Eve live?" The second one says, "The Garden of Eden." Saint Peter says, "You can go through."
Finally, he gets to the third nun and says, "What was the first thing Eve said to Adam?" The nun stands there a little confused and says, "Boy, that's a hard one." Saint Peter, shocked, goes, "That's correct! Go on in."