Worst Jokes Ever
What is worse than ants in your pants? Michael Jackson.
Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?
A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?
A physically disabled heterosexual male.
My friend said an apple a day keeps the orphan away. I said only if you throw it hard enough.
What did I say to the bridge?
Bye, bridge.
Me: Hey, are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
What's the difference between a light bulb and a woman?
You can screw and unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a woman.
The Twin Towers ordered a sesame bagel. They got the plane one instead.
Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.
In fact, they hang with them!
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes.
What does Michael say when he laughs? He he.
Q: Why did the orphan cross the road?
A: To get to the other side to find his parents.
There was no other side of the road.
Why are people in Japan so thin?
Because it didn't end well the last time a Fat Man was there.
Are you a mental hospital? Cause I need to be in you.
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
Why should you never make height jokes about dwarfs?
It goes right over their head.
I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.
Cop: "I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia."
Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"