Worst Jokes Ever
Do you know why you should never let a blonde handle grenades?
They'll end up only throwing the pin.
Cashier: "Will you want the milk in a bag today, sir?"
Customer: "I’ll just keep it in the carton if you don’t mind."
Why did the car key never fit in?
He was too door key.
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
What’s the similarity between your uncle and your hands?
They can both do dirty things.
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, "her life."
Where do bunnies go when they're sick?
The hoppital.
How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man into giving him a blowjob?
The gay man asks the heterosexual man if he wants to give him a "brojob."
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
Did you know that French fries aren't from France? They're cooked in Greece.
Why do French people like to eat snails so much?
They can't stand fast food.
How to make time fly?
Answer: Throw a clock out of the window.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.