Worst Jokes Ever
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not lay a finger on her!
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.
What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?
Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.
Don’t worry if you have a stroke.
You’ll be all right.
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? They both like fairies sitting on them.
What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man?
Get a fucking job.
My friend asked me how fast my humor was, and I said it jumps borders. Then he asked how dark my humor is, and I said it picks cotton.
In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.
Hell in Greek times was known as cold and misty... so now just look at Seattle.
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Yo mama so fat, she has her own event horizon.
So, a guy walks into a bar, and he tells the bartender, "After this last drink, I'm going to the roof to kill myself." A guy sitting next to him says, "I wouldn't do that if I were you." in which the man replies, "Oh yeah?" So, they both take their shots and go up to the roof. The guy says, "You're not gonna die, watch this!" He jumps off the roof and comes back up. The man rubs his eyes and tells him to go it again. He comes down and comes back up. The man says, "Cool, let me try!" and he jumps down only to kill himself. The guy goes back to the bar, and the bartender says, "Superman, you're an asshole."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To end his pain and suffering.
I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.