Worst Jokes Ever
John: Hi, boss, it is raining heavily today, so I will not be coming.
Boss: You stated in your job application that swimming was your hobby, so see you at 11 AM.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt, quack!
Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let's go to bed.
Lauren: Fine, but it's early.
*Karen wakes up and exits room*
*Lauren hears noise*
Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.
Lauren: *laughs*
Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*
Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, "I still love Vista, baby."
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
Why can’t pedophiles ever win races? Because they are always coming in a little behind.
What do you call the girl with no arms and no legs?
Names.
Why did the feminist kill herself?
Because she was TRIGGERED.
A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
Man: I got fired from my job at the calendar factory.
Lady: What did you do?
Man: I took a day off...
A white dude walks up to a Muslim and says, "So you're an Indian?" and the Muslim says, "No brotha, I'm not 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11."
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She's retarded.
I met a rock the other day. He was a very gneiss guy.
I tried writing with a dull pencil the other day, but there was no point.
Why was the sun ☀️ mad at the clouds ☁️?
Because the clouds kept throwing shade.
I'm not gay, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One screams when you put it in a blender, and the other one is a cooperative little fruit.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Q. What does Kenny get when he hugs his mom?
A. A boner.
Do you want to know the most racist game? Chess. You wanna know why? Because they never let black go first. I wonder why... lmao.