Worst Jokes Ever
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
The depressed kid at school tried giving the tree a high five.
It left him hanging.
Why was JFK stupid? He only had half a brain.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They put doorknobs on a wall and said, "Open the door."
My hair strainer is hotter than you.
Alzheimer's protesters march chanting. "What do we want? Better treatment... When do we want it? ...Want what?"
Why did the skeleton start a fight? Because he had a bone to pick.
How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.
Science can fly you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
“Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?”
No sun.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.
Sometimes, stairs get me down.
I fell down the stairs once.
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
I never knew how to use a boomerang, until it hit me.
Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.