Why can't you play Uno with Mexicans? They steal all the green cards.
Worst Jokes Ever
This isn't a joke, but I'm a survivor and use humor to cope. I find these extremely funny, so please leave the people writing these alone 😭
"Wanna play the rape game?"
"No!!!!"
"That's the spirit!"
FIRST DATE
Man: "I work with animals every day." Woman: "Oh, how sweet! What is it that you do?" Man: "I'm a butcher..."
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
I would roast you but burning trash is bad for the environment.
"Waiter, my steak is too skinny."
"It's a strip steak, sir."
"At these prices, it should not only strip, but sing and dance too!"
What do you call it when Panera Bread has bread?
Panera Bread.
Men: "I like dogs."
Women: "I like cats."
Chinese: "Food is food."
When the school shooter misses you, but you gotta play it off.
😐😑
The depressed kid went to give a tree a high five...
...but it left him hanging.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One is made of plastic and bad for kids; the other one holds shopping.
Knott and Shott got into a gunfight. Knott was shot and Shott was not. Therefore, it was better to be Shott than Knott. But what if the shot Shott shot didn't hit Knott but Shott? Then the shot Shott shot shot Shott.
Dark humor is like a cancer, it's funnier when a kid gets it.
Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?
A. System of a Down's syndrome.
Two brothers play on the street. One of them finds a condom on the ground. Not knowing what it is, they go to their mum and ask what it is that they found. Mum gets mad and yells to throw that away immediately.
Guys go back to the yard, surprised why their mum got mad for just latex. One of them says: "Why did mum get so angry?" The other: "I have no idea, thankfully we did not tell her that we've eaten the yogurt inside!"
The moment when she tells you: "I'm a virgin. Be gentle!" And you tell her, "Don't worry, I used to work with kids."
My dad told me to stop with the suicide jokes, so I said I’ll cut it out.
