Worst Jokes Ever
Q: What was the last thing the United Healthcare CEO heard before he got shot?
A: "It's me, Luigi!"
What do you call a booty that can do magic?
A butt trick!
The great meme reset is like a fart. If you force it, it's gonna be shit.
If you are a student at law school, a law professor can charge you up to $98,998.00 for one semester.
If the law professor is very late and is not punctual to teach you anything about law in his class, should a law student be able to charge the law professor a certain amount of money for not being able to teach his class because he is off task and not being punctual? Is your time precious too?
If the law professor is Polish, now you know the reason why you should never go to a law school that has a "dumb polack" for a law professor.
Sorry for your luck; it sucks to be you!
A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."
And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
How do you call an iPhone cover in Germany?
An apple bag. 😜
Yo mama's so poor that she only watches Frozen to hear Elsa sing "Let It Go."
Yo mama's so ugly that Sonic needed to go fast to get away from her face.
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
I'm so depressed, I gave my therapist trauma.
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
How do butts stay cool in the summer?
They stay in crack conditioning.
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.
He orders a beer.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
What were the last words of your grandma in 2020?
"Oh, I think I forgot my mask!"
POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
How many babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Well, obviously not 10; my basement's still dark.