Worst Jokes Ever
What is long that Paul Walker can fit into his mouth? A long black tree.
How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb in the middle of the night?
I don't know, I can never see them.
Your mom is like a penny: two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants.
What do ghosts put on their bagels 🥯?
Scream Cheese 😱.
Hey, what is the difference between a painting and a wife?
Only the wife was hung up.
What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song?
Beat It.
Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.
Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it had better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.
What do you call Stephen Hawking in a burning building?
Hot Wheels.
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert?
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.
Never break a girl's/boy's/someone's heart. They only have one of them.
Break their bones instead. They have 206 of them.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
What is boring? Talking about boring things.
A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.
Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"
Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."
Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.
Priest
How is abortion different from rape? Babies never consent to it.
Why are Americans good at Rubik's Cubes?
They're so good at separating colors.
Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?
American: Self defense.
Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?