Worst Jokes Ever
The depressed kid wanted a high-five from the tree, but it left him hangin'.
What do you call a depressed a cappella group?
Self-Harmony.
Why do gay men like the filling in Hostess Twinkies?
It reminds them of cum. 😋 😍 😏 😜
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
My therapist said: "Time heals all wounds."
I shot her, now we wait.
what do you call a terrorist attack in india?
a wednesday.
WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.
Why shouldn’t you play basketball with a pig?
Because he’s a ball hog.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?
What kind of bee can't fly?
A KOBE.
What is an Iraqi kid's favorite game?
Minesweeper.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
I'm in jail for 5 minutes and I already got fucked 15 times. You don't have any idea how much I hate playing Monopoly with my dad.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?
A: He got shot.
I can tell a joke :)
Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
Why can't Asians make a white baby?
Cause two wongs don't make a white.