Worst Jokes Ever
What is black and long?
A line at KFC.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree? The apples get picked.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have nobody to call "daddy."
My grandpa died in 9/11. He crashed a plane.
Why do orphans love elevators?
They raise people!
Everyone else seems to have met my dad. I only have the mugshots.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.
I asked an emo kid if they were jealous because their phone died before them.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about society?
The Joker.
Whatâs the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Friend: Hi, orphan.
Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.
Friend: ummm
Orphan: Exactly, U can't.
Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
Whatâs the only other advantage of being an orphan?
The teacher canât give you homework.
Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Tell world's best yo mama joke to an orphan, then watch them cry.
I'm related to diarrhea; it runs in my jeans.
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"
"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? âPut it on my bill.â
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you canât sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacherâs eyes crossed? She couldnât control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, âmini-sodaâ).
12. Why couldnât the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you canât use âbeef stewâ as a password. Itâs not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldnât you write with a broken pencil? Because itâs pointless.