Worst Jokes Ever
Me: *Calls friend* "Dude, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder!"
Friend: "Bro, you ok?!"
Me: "Yeah, lucky I only fell off the first step!"
When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.
A condom!
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
I looked in the mirror.
Michael Vick is coming to town, hide your dogs!
Is shooting and killing a pregnant woman a spawn kill or double kill?
Like, and comment if you're single.
Your dad? Oh wait, you don’t have that!
If one of ya'll could find my weave, that'd be great!
Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!
US Marine: Knock Knock!
Al Qaeda fighter: Who's there?
US Marine: (Kicks down door, throws grenade, opens fire) FREEDOM, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!
What do 9/11 and COVID-19 have in common?
I couldn't give a fuck about either.
What did the traffic light say to the other?
"Hey, stop looking at me! I'm changing!"
I go to Venus to get a bigger penis.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces!! HAHAHA
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.
Why is the iPhone 7 not a smartphone?
It doesn't know jack.