Time jokes
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.
Anne Frank: This one time at camp, someone had too much gas.
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
I named my refrigerator Oicurmt, because every time I look in, I say, "O I C, U R MT."
Why was the pregnant cow mad all the time? It wasn’t in for the moo-d.
Two Timetravers walk into a bar...
...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."
I left a chunk of ice outside during summer. That was the first time I heard icescream.
Your mom is so fat, every time she turns around, it's her birthday.
Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."
What time is it when you can walk home from school today and walk?
Hi 👋 I love 💗 you walk in and out the door 🚪 night. I did not have time today. I was just a little bit and I had to walk home from home after dinner. I
Every time someone calls you a little different, car? Just say, "No, I'm not."
What time is it when you eat a Christmas tree?
Time to get a new Christmas tree! 🎄
How many times do you nut? It depends how hard you do it.
It's hard to predict the future,
especially before it happens.
"We make sexy time, yes, and every night I tap that."
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had mad flow!
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had a PHAT BEAT to keep them in check!