This jokes

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

My friend said this to me: "Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen." :(

I know this isn't about glue, but here's one:

Cardi B had a sister who was obsessed with fitness. Her name? Cardi O.

If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?

An American.

This is fucked up, my name is Shaylie.

Why can’t you play games with cats? Because they always ‘cheetah’.

Q: Why did baby shark cross the Pacific Ocean?

A: To find his dad.

This had me wheezing 😂🤣😂🤣

I have a better version of this joke.

How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.

I told this man to rev his vehicle.

Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.

9/10/01

Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”

Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈

I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.

Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.

Imagine this whole “Dr. Strange jokes” is just full of people simping over him.

Couldn’t Be Me.

A priest, a rabbi, and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, “Is this some kind of joke?”

What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?

"What does this button do...?"

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before!

I forgot you can't make depression jokes outside of Twitter, lmao. My coworker was like, "You ready for this year to be over?"

I was like, "I'm ready for this life to be over." He was like, "Bro, what?"

This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.

My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.

(If you see this joke with a blue "S" that's also me. I just have an acc now.)