This jokes

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.

What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?

"What does this button do...?"

A priest, a rabbi, and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, “Is this some kind of joke?”

OK, OK, what's up with the fake Gwens? I am going to use a test to see who is real or not.

The real Gwen will know this. When did I come onto this website? Next question, what is my real name, and do I go on cursing rampages? Only the real Gwen can complete this test with the right answers.

I ought to complain to Spotify for you not being named this week’s hottest single.

Why were the students jealous of the orphan?

He never had any homework!

(I'm going to hell for this)

This is our motto- "Never fear orphans! You are even more special than diamonds."

Orphan club for ppl who stand up for orphans!

I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.

I forgot you can't make depression jokes outside of Twitter, lmao. My coworker was like, "You ready for this year to be over?"

I was like, "I'm ready for this life to be over." He was like, "Bro, what?"

I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.

Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.

Imagine this whole “Dr. Strange jokes” is just full of people simping over him.

Couldn’t Be Me.

I told this man to rev his vehicle.

Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.

9/10/01

Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”

I made a page for this orphan, but sadly it didn’t have a homepage.

Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈

So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?

So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

This is fucked up, my name is Shaylie.

If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?

An American.