Think jokes

Kid walks in the door. "Mommy and Daddy, I'm home." Mommy and Daddy meanwhile in their room moaning. Kid runs to them thinking they're hurt and sees something he definitely shouldn't have.

10 minutes later, [he] kills himself.

If you think vanilla and chocolate ice cream is just light and dark mode.

When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.

Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.

So I threw a coconut at her.

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

New teacher: Everyone stand up if you think you are stupid.

Student: Stands up.

Teacher: Why did you stand up?

Student: I hate seeing you stand up there by yourself.

I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.

Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.

Your forehead so big you got to go outside to think.

I was thinking of starting up a stair company, but there were too many steps to it.

In 2006 on 6/9, there was something called communication opportunity happened. On 6/9. 69. Coincidence? I think NOT.

I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.

The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!

I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.

What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.

This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”

The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”

Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."

What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...

I think Kobe misunderstood the 6-ft rule.

My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.

But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"

So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.

“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.

“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.

So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”

“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”