How many emo kids does it take to screw in a bulb?
None, because they all cry in the dark.
They Jokes
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
Why were the people in the Twin Towers such good readers?
They went through 110 stories in 10 seconds.
What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They put doorknobs on a wall and said, "Open the door."
Don't be scared of skeletons.
They don't have the guts for murder.
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!
Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.
The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
I went to go hang out with the emo kids, but they already did.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't hit a home run.
Why don’t midgets fight? They walk away to be the bigger man.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
What do orphans, parents, and trees have in common? They leafed.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is!
Why can't orphans work at McDonald's? Because they call their employees family.
I was happy for once, and my family was happy I was happy, but that all changed when they found out I was thinking about bridges and humans.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
What do emos and the Lorax have in common?
They both hang with trees.
