They jokes
Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.
Why do they call my dick section 8?
Because all the hoes are on it.
I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"
He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."
Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.
Why do Chinese people hate Christmas? Because they make the toys.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Memes
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
I told my suicidal friends to stop posting suicidal memes. They said they will stop soon.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. They got plane.
Why don’t cheetahs get married?
They always cheat on each other.
Why can’t orphans get married?
Because they were already given away.
Yo mama so ugly, when she tried to enter an ugly contest, they said they didn't allow professionals.
What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?
They both thank you for your financial support.
Ever wondered why my gay kids don't play basketball? Because they can't shoot the ball straight into the hoop.
Q: Why can’t orphans be criminals?
A: They are not wanted.
What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Two baked beans traveled around Australia.
They both ended up in Cairns.
If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing, and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dad's pants. Little Johnny says, "That explains what the lady next door was doing."