They jokes
Why do pills work?
Because they are white.
My disabled dad went to the grocery store.
He got lost and yet they couldn’t find him.
Finally, he was found after a kid told them he was in the vegetable aisle.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
You don't need brains to be a Boss.
When the body was first created, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control all of the body's responses and functions."
The feet said, "We should be Boss since we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."
Finally, the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So, the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time, the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic, and the brain fevered. Eventually, they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!
Moral Of The Story: You don't need a brain to be a Boss----any asshole will do.
Why do cheetahs never get an A+ on a test? They always cheetah!
There is one good part about paedophiles... they go slow in school zones.
We should enjoy the present while it's here. Do you know why they call it the present? Because it's a gift.
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
I never liked unnatural adult stars with implants and face surgeries because they look photoshopped, and they always need a ton of lube to get into due to how plastic they are.
What does Michael Jackson and tuna fish have in common?
They both come in small can.
If two stoners get married, do they have joint assets?
Why is it okay to make fun of orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
They don’t have a closet to hide in.
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Why are Americans bad at chess? Because they lost two towers.
Why are there not that many phones in China? Because there’s too much Wing and Wong, so they will "wing" the wrong number.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."