They jokes
After getting in the White House, D. Trump gets a letter...
...from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:
370HSSV 0773H
All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.
One of the agents suggests Trump ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:
"Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down."
How do angels 😇 make holy water 💧?
They boil the hell out of it.
Why can’t orphanage kids play baseball?
Cause they don’t know where home is.
What does Earl Bradley and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?
Because they are afraid of American airdrops.
Fred and Mary got married, but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's parent's home for their first night together.
In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet.
She replies, "No".
Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school."
Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
She replies, "No."
Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school."
After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
His mom says "No."
He asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His Mom replies, "Ok, do tell me what you think?"
He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue."
What do my parents have in common with Nemo? They can't be found.
What's the difference between Derek Boogaard and Kurt Cobain? Nothing, they were both fucked in the brain when they died.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 67 stories in 0.67 milliseconds.
Why are orphans so happy on Christmas? Because they might get a family.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball?
Because they ate all the bats.
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
What do a fat woman and bricks have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans.
I’d like to take you to the movies, but unfortunately, they don’t let you bring your own snacks.
What do depressed people do when they’re bored?
They “Hang” Out.
What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.
Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.
What did they find in Jeffery Dahmer's apartment?
Jack in a box.
Why do trans women go by she/her?
Because if they went by her/she, they'd be Hershey's.
Why can't Asians play Baseball?
Because they ate the bat.