Themselves jokes

Why should you be friends with emos? Because you get to scan their bar code for 20% off, and when it expires, they get rid of themselves.

I hate Russian dolls. They're so full of themselves.

Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

What sucks about disabled people?

They can't stand up for themselves.

What's the difference between an emo and my clothes?

My clothes don't hang themselves.

So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.

I'm going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!

Depressed procrastinators feel like they wanna kill themselves sometime soon.

I wish my nails were emo so that they would cut themselves.

Emos do take shots of themselves... not with a camera, though.

If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.

Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.

The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.

"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.

The driver leans over to the other priest, and they whisper between themselves.

Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."

If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied? Because they can never stand up for themselves.

Yo mama is so old that when she was in history class as a kid, all they learned about was themselves!

I told the ugly friend in my friend group that when they daydream, they shouldn't picture themselves because it will just ruin it.

Why is it bad to high five an emo?

They will leave themselves hanging.

Why are kids so skinny?

Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.

Can a person in a wheelchair stand up for themselves?

Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.