Themselves jokes
What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?
They both like keeping one sock for themselves.
Why did Hitler go for handicap?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
I don't joke about paraplegics; they wouldn't be able to stand up for themselves.
Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.
The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.
I can't believe my friends. They killed themselves without me!
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
What did one emo kid say to the other? "Nice cuts, G!" (because they like to cut themselves).
Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.
One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.
Don't tell me to accept trannies for who they are when they can't even accept themselves for who they are.
A guy in a white helmet telling kids to kill themselves.
Why do orphans like the movie Home Alone?
Because they're home alone themselves!
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
People in wheelchairs should really stand up for themselves!
Why do transgender people have high rates of suicide?
Because they can't accept themselves for who they are, but they want everyone else to accept them.
Why do trannies have such high rates of suicide?
Because they want everyone to accept them, but they can't accept themselves.
When a hedgehog finds poop, they put it in their mouths. They mix it with saliva until it's a foam, then rub it on themselves.