Tell jokes

You know, people always tell you to stand up for yourself. Why didn't anyone tell the World Trade Center that? 🤔

When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.

You have to tell this to a friend:

There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10

Why can orphans stay out until whatever time?

Because their parents won't tell them when to come home.

Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).

Student: How should I know, that's his story?

Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?

Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.

If your best friend tells you that he's gay for you, what do you do? Tell him, "Oh, nice gay ass."

What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?

Just hang in there, man.

We better stop telling orphan jokes because their parents will get mad. Oh... wait... never mind.

It is now legal to bully an orphan.

What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

What can you tell [is] the difference between Stephen Hawking and a carrot?

Nothing.

I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.

Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.

Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.

What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.

Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:

You) I 1 poopoo

(Them) I 2 poopoo

(You) I 3 poopoo

(Them) I 4 poopoo

(You) I 5 poopoo

(Them) I 6 poopoo

(You) I 7 poopoo

(Them) I 8 poopoo

And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”

I'm thinking about telling my daughter there's a ghost in the house. At least then I can wear a bed sheet at night and fuck her without her being suspicious.

So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”

If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"

You can get into a fight with an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

How do you get a blonde to drown? You tell them the bottom of the pool smells weird.

Someone eats glue and tells the other, "Sorry, can't stick around!"