Technology jokes
Why do people say "cheese" in a camera?
Because they were using the computer.
Stephen Hawking + Computer = SMART!
Stephen Hawking + Shoulder = HUNGRY!
What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?
"An RC-XD!"
How did Stephen Hawking really die?
His wife grounded him from using electronics and unplugged everything!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a power cut.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.
So I'm the cable guy around the neighborhood, and I do everybody's cable. So I walked into this one house, and I noticed a little kid and the mom was upstairs. I was asking where her mom was, and she wasn't answering, and it looked like something was wrong, so I asked if anything was wrong. She didn't answer, so I kind of raised my voice at her, but she still didn't answer, and then I realized the hearing aid in her ear.
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.
Who is Stephen Hawking's wife?
The American Siri.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
NASA stands for... National Adult S3x Association.
Did you know the Bible has a passage about killing babies by smashing them against rocks?
That's probably because microwaves hadn't been invented yet.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
What pictures did turtles take?
Shell-fies!
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
What is a computer's favorite snack? Cookies!
If you're ever bored, pee on an android. Apple is better!
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
Damn bro, that calculator is looking hot today. It got abs!
When you get suspended from school for giving the deaf kid AirPods for his birthday.