Team jokes
There’s no “I” in team, but there is a “U” in cunt.
(On their 1-2 loss to Watford) Ty: Well, we mustn't forget that it's been raining so...
Robbie: It's been raining???
Ty: Yeah!
Robbie: Are you being serious??? It's raining for both teams!
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the squad?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
So NFL teams were playing football on me, and then Justin Jefferson hit something called "the gritty" on me.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Memes
You can give a hockey team airplane a new source of heating, but it went too far on September 7th, 2011, when the Yaroslavl plane crash happened.
The coach yelled at me when I stole home. I ran home with the base and asked him where to put it.
I was going to join the debating team.
... but someone talked me out of it.
Why is England's team unfair in chess?
Because 2 rooks = 10 and a queen = 9.
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that Keagan's FIFA team should be this terrible, also the problem is that Keagan is a Real Madrid fan.
I work at a movie studio.
Unfortunately, the team I was working with was useless.
The team:
In Rocket League, you don't care who wins game MVP as long as it's not somebody on the other team.
Yo mama so Irish that she thought the Chicago Shamrox were a Quadball team.
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite football team? New York Jets!!!
In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Midixadrupin, Midixarizin or Dixafix.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
He doesn’t know where home is.
My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.
So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!"
Soldier: "Let's clear the field!"
Officer: "Ok!"
*silence*
*explosion*
Girl: Hi (flirt)
Boy: Hi? (reluctant)
Girl: I'm a cheerleader captain, I'm also single (flirt).
Boy 2: Excuse me?! He's MY MAN...