Afghanistan jokes
What do you call an Afghan in the bath? A bath bomb.
What did the Taliban say to the Afghan?
Nothing, they blew him up.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
Drop me in Afghanistan with a cigar, a Kobe jersey, a MAC-10, a Lambo Huracan with a bumper delete, and a Toyota Tacoma with an M249 on the back. Then I'll have Afghanistan as the 51st state by midnight.
I'm going to pull out your lungs faster than Joe Biden pulled troops out of Afghanistan.
"You the bomb!" No, "you the bomb!" A compliment in America, an argument in Afghanistan.
Three people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from, but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: "Local calls are free."
I hate when I lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. Where do I lose my friends from Afghanistan?
In an explosion.
Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?
In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣
I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.
Q: Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?
A: Because there's a Target on every corner.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
9/10/01
Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”
Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.
you.
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
Where is the pocket?
It is there, the pocket.
Which country makes me crack the fuck up?
LAUGHghanistan.
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.