Tea Jokes

I hate when my father doesn't cook me cocktails for tea.

What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid? Reality.

Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly.

After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes.

The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it:

"Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please."

His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep.

After a good night's rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went.

The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn.

The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared.

The receptionist responds:

"Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke."

My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgent coming in tomorrow im super excited to work with him the next day we had to do our first ever open hart surgery so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient so we finished the surgery and went out side for a smoke and we were talking I said why did you keep the patients blood on your glove? He replied we in my free time I test it for anything diseases HIV the next day I got invited to his house and we had some drinks I said this is amazing red tea what is in it just the 2000 people you have cut opened .

Wife: Honey! Do you like tea? Husband : No, I like after "T"! .............. It means: the letter "U" : you!

A toddler, was giving her daddy a tea party She brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course. After several cups of tea , her Mom came home, Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!" Mom waited, and sure enough, here she come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it up and then says, "You know the only place she can reach water, is the toilet!

Sugar Honey Ice Tea

I FORGOT MY JOKE

i like my men like i like my coffe black and hot

feeling stressed? have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, U make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz, It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-

Shorts go up,Pants go down Body to Body, Skin to Skin When its sniff, Stick it in It goes in dry and comes out wet And the longer its in the stronger it gets it comes out dripping and starts to sag

Its not what you think it is its a LIPTON TEA BAG

Get your mind together

How does Moses make his tea? He Brews!!!

What's a queen's favorite drink? Royal-tea!

i hate you- if you look at the first letters of the words you'll know what i mean interfischl happy apple tea eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

A magic genie tells Tom,"I can make anything of yours disappear!" Tom:[raises his mug]: Okay,get rid of my tea. Genie:poof! om:it didn't work.

Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea, the assistant asked him if "he wanted a roll with it"

Why do emo kids drink only herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.

Why cant I drink tea??

Because I laugh to much TEEEEEHEHEEE

Never drink tea in school... L give people tea if they've passed out....tea can be nice but only havd it once a day... Its not what you think..... Its not tea its CPR