Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox, and nobody raises an eyebrow.
Talk Jokes
There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
I was walking till I saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said, "Where are your parents?" He cried even more.
Oh, I just love talking to orphans.
Clash Royale = CR
Angry Birds = AB
Minecraft = MC
Talking Ben = TB
Clash of Clans = COC 🤨
I'm Jessica, and I really want to talk to Ashton Parkes.
I like porn a lot. I was wondering if you guys can talk to me.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.”
I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door, and it’s working fine!
I don’t have another talking stage in me. 🤦🏿♂️ Do you squirt, and is your BD dead? 😭
Can we stop talking about 9/11? My dad died, man, but he was a good pilot.
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
Friend: How's it going?
Me: Good, things are good!
Parent: How are you?
Me: Oh, I'm fine!
Twitter: Compose new tweet?
Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.
I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.
Never talk about 9/11 to me. I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot ;(
My teacher asked me what my favorite number was yesterday, and I said 2977. I chose 91 for my football jersey number and Sharpied a 1 after the other 1, and my teacher Mr. Jackson's dad died in 9/11, and when he was talking about it Friday the 9th, I threw a paper airplane at him and got suspended for 3 days starting Monday.
Can we stop talking about 9/11? I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot.
The judge asked Bill Cosby for his defense. He used feminist talking points and said "My body, my choice" and "It's my right to privacy." The judge, being impartial, let Cosby go.
Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?
Technoblade: Makes jokes about orphans while in hospital.
Doctors to Technoblade's dad: Sorry for your loss.
Technoblade: What do you mean?? I'm right here!!
Orphans found parents: Who's he talking to??
So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.
"If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"
"If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"
And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:
"Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"
Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"
