POV: Your grandma is on life support. I would unplug her life support to charge my third phone.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.
A UN survey asked the following: Please, in your honest opinion, could you give your thoughts on the food shortages in the rest of the world?
It was a failure because:
South Americans don’t know the word “please.”
Eastern Europeans don’t know the word “honest.”
Middle Easterns don’t know the word “opinion.”
Balkans don’t know the word “give.”
Chinese don’t know the word “thoughts.”
Africans don’t know the word “food.”
Western Europeans don’t know the word “shortage.”
Americans don’t know the words “the rest of the world.”
Then they simply explained “just donate healthy food to the global south to help.” But that still didn’t sit right with everyone, because Israelis do not know the word “donate,” and Pacific Islanders do not know the words “healthy food.”
What's the difference between me and my mate...
I left my dad, while hers left with their friend Cancer.
What do you call a gay pride parade that was ran over?
Rainbow road.
A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.
It’s called Trycoxagain.
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
What do we want?!
A CURE FOR TOURETTES!!
When do we want it?!
CUNT!!!
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
Welcome to Alex's orphanage, you make 'em, we take 'em.
I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.
Hahahahaha......... Autism.
Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.
Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
What is better to have autism or down syndrome or ADHD?
