Suicide jokes
My life.
What do apples and depressed kids have in common?
They both hang on trees.
What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?
Suicide squad.
When you're asked to tell a crazy story, but the first thing that comes up to your mind is a suicide attempt:
"Oh, I don't remember anything in particular. 😅😀"
Where did the mushroom kill himself?
In the mushroom.
Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"
The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"
Rowan
Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say "bleach".
How do you get a trans woman to commit suicide?
Use he/him pronouns on him.
It's muffi time, 'cause I wanna die, die, die.
What do you call an emo dating another emo?
The suicide duo.
A man named Icide ruined my life. I asked a friend if he would help me sue him. He said yes. But for some reason, he killed me.
All I wanted was for someone to help me sue Icide...
Your momma's so depressed, she shot herself in the head hoping she'd die.
My older sister said she was gonna shoot herself, so I did it for her.
I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him…
What falls first, an apple or an Emo kid?
An apple, because the Emo has a rope holding them.
Penis, neck, rope?
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
When someone tells me to kill myself,
Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.
Why did Hitler commit suicide?
He got the gas bill.