Suicide gives your security for the future. Decide the day of suicide and live with full joy till that day and you can choose to postpone it.

I once heard my dad shout I’m going to be like frozen and let it go then I heard a gunshot

What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? None you are both dead on the inside.

Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it

I’m a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.

What is a suicide packs favorite song… Let the bodies hit floor

I wanted to solve Teen Suicide, so I shot up a Middle School.

Why do emo people want to be called scene now, the only thing I’ve scene from them is there suicide rate climbing

i like when people say they hate me because we have something in common <3

When you are suicidal comedic relief sometimes helps. These jokes sometimes help you realize how many more people feel the way you do and how ridiculous it sounds sometimes.

But joke time…

I’m giving in my two week resignation to life… it’s not you … it’s me!!!

(A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing)

Man: Ah… suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump? Lady: Yep. I hate this world. Man: Well, if your gonna die, can we have sex before you jump? Lady: Hell no! You creep! Man: Ok, fine. I guess I’ll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore…

look in the mirror there’s a joke for you

Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide? Dave: No. Jason: Well, he hit his first target.

Why did the feminist kill herself?

Because she was TRIGGERED.

friend: hits head* others: how many fingers am i holding up? me: to friend* how suicidal am i on a scale from one to ten? friend: ten me: hes fine guys

‘’ What place can you always find suicidal cows at? ‘’

“Mc Donald’s.”

A man walks into a bar, he gets a concussion.

After 2 months of recovering, the same man rushes head first into the bar. He goes into a coma.

After 2 years, he amazingly wakes up. He then gets in his car and drives into the bar at 70 mph. He dies. Did I mention he was suicidal?

Random guy: Go suck a D*ck! Me: Nah, i rather suck a 9mm.

What did the suicidal leperchaun say Irish i was dead

Don’t bother; just try to live in England.