Suicide Jokes

You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)

What is the best cure for aging?

Suicide.

Someone asked me why I'm Still here...the answer is simple I don't want to be used as a school assembly

I have a funny joke: my life

U wanna hear a Suicide joke nvm it didn’t make it

What's a depressed persons favourite drink

Depresso espresso

Nah just kidding it's bleach

What do you do when life gives you lemons Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist.🙂💊💉

What does a relationship and suicide have in common?

I always fail on committing

My dad is like my depression you need a suicide letter to find him

I tried to commit suicide today; never doing that again I almost killed myself

If you jump off a bridge while crying, it's suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming parquor it's a failed stunt.

suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry

Random guy: Go suck a D*ck! Me: Nah, i rather suck a 9mm.

if i hung myself from a cliff would people call me a cliffhanger?

So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis, we talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing to her about being suicidal, she's been very helpful throughout it, I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.