‘’ What place can you always find suicidal cows at? ‘’

“Mc Donald’s.”

Go commit neck rope

What is a suicide packs favorite song… Let the bodies hit floor

Go commit Thanos finger snap.

Why did the feminist kill herself?

Because she was TRIGGERED.

Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide? Dave: No. Jason: Well, he hit his first target.

Me: Hey dad, I’m in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal…

Dad: Hi in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal! I’m dad!

Don’t bother; just try to live in England.

what do you call a chicken who crossed the road…suicidal

On the lines of “I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous”,

I’m dying to live forever !

I talked to a future suicide bomber, I told him, “ISIS ain’t got Sh** on me because I Planted a bomb and lived.”

These gags are killing me !

To all you who can’t understand using jokes as coping mechanism… you know what i will ask of you:)

I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi’s concerts… I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.

A man walks into a bar, he gets a concussion.

After 2 months of recovering, the same man rushes head first into the bar. He goes into a coma.

After 2 years, he amazingly wakes up. He then gets in his car and drives into the bar at 70 mph. He dies. Did I mention he was suicidal?

Go Kermit toaster bath

Why did Kayla go to the river when she was sad??

To drown herself

so a man was on a ledge ready to kill himself because he got laid off at work and his girlfriend cheated on him he was about to jump until he saw from a mountain side a little guy with no arms dancing around so he thought maybe my life aint so bad so he went to the mountain side thank you he said i was gonna jump off a bridge and kill myself until i saw you dancing even though youu have no arms dancing? the armless man said bitterly my asshole itches and i cant scratch it

This guy walks into a library one day and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian says f*** no you won’t return it