Suicide jokes
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life.
I don't care about her life either hahahaha!! :)
What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?
His teeth.
When I grow up, I wanna be like Lil Peep... Dead.
What do Logan Paul, KSI, and the Japanese suicide victim have in common?
Tying.
This guy walks into a library one day and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says, "F*** no, you won’t return it!"
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.
My dad: You better wear flip-flops everywhere.
Suicidal son: Goes to crack alley.
The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.
Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.
I wanted to solve teen suicide, so I shot up a middle school.
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, slut!"
I walked towards him.
"I prefer slit," I said.
"Why?" He asked.
"You see these wrists?" I spat at him.
A friend asked me, "Where are you going?"
I answered, "6 feet underground."
What do you not want to do when it comes to giving an emo a job?
Showing them the ropes.
What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.
Friend: Why don't you cut your hair?
Me: Dunno, but I'll probably cut my wrists first.
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Just cut the rope.
...
Robin asks Batman what he is getting his parents for Christmas. Batman gets mad, slaps Robin, and runs off crying.
Now you know why Batman Beyond was born when Bruce died. cause of death: suicide
Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.
So, a guy walks into a bar, and he tells the bartender, "After this last drink, I'm going to the roof to kill myself." A guy sitting next to him says, "I wouldn't do that if I were you." in which the man replies, "Oh yeah?" So, they both take their shots and go up to the roof. The guy says, "You're not gonna die, watch this!" He jumps off the roof and comes back up. The man rubs his eyes and tells him to go it again. He comes down and comes back up. The man says, "Cool, let me try!" and he jumps down only to kill himself. The guy goes back to the bar, and the bartender says, "Superman, you're an asshole."