Suicide

Suicide jokes

I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...

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  • I’m giving in my two week resignation to life... it’s not you ... it’s me!!!

    Me: Hey dad, I'm in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal!

    Dad: Hi in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal! I'm dad!

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  • I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:

    If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?

    To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I'm still here.

    Please, can someone comment on this post to explain what satisfaction you get from joking about such serious issues?

    Stop joking about suicide, it's not funny. You people must be so ignorant to be able to joke about such serious issues that you clearly are uneducated on.

    What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?

    A cliffhanger.

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