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Store jokes

I found a dog outside a store, so I took him home with me.

The dog was standing outside a blind supplies store.

Two priests walk into a store, and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester, and the priests both say, "I’ll do it!"

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.

My husband asked me to get 6 cans of Sprite at the store. I realized when I got home that I had picked 7-Up.

Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?

Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.

I walked into a supermarket to get some ordinary clothes for the wife. Then I realized I was in a rape museum.

Look, Bono is a great guy, but shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.

Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.

Random person: What stuff? 🤨

Me: What?

The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!

Me: Colourful flamingo fart.

A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.

But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?

There's no Asian kids in my class, but it just happens to be the rice store and the pet store just ran out of stock...

Why can’t orphans build anything?

Because they can’t go to Home Depot.

What do K-mart and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both have boys' pants half off.