The 70+ Best Sell Jokes

I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof

A preacher was selling a horse. A cowboy decided to buy the horse. The preacher told the cowboy to make the horse go, to say 'Thank God' and to stop the horse, to say ' Hallelujah'. The cowboy then rode off into the sunset until he came upon a cliff, searching his memory he yelled hallelujah and the horse stopped just before going off the cliff. Then the cowboy said 'Thank God".

Chuck Norris decided to sell his urine as an energy drink, which you now know as RedBull

What's the difference between drugs and kids?

I don't sell drugs.

Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up? Me: Oh I wan- Therapist: Don’t say to be dead Me: Well I want to be an entrepreneur, I want to sell land, pencils oh yeah. I also want to sell farm

If there was someone selling drugs around here, weed know

I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.

How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?

Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.

Yo mama is so fat, she goes to the beach to sell shade.

I started selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are through the roof!

Why are Egyptian gods orphans Because Egypt needs to sell Anubis (a-new-bus) every year to make a prophet

I wonder if the titanic still sells fish?

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What do kids and drugs have in common , I sell both of the

Shit! My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs! I've been his customer for 4 years, but I had no idea he was a barber.

If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..

A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said "you are what we are looking for, but i need to test your skills." *he hands her a pen* He said "sell me this pen" She puts in between her boobs.

Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says “what’s the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks? “ The man says “it’s not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place.”

A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says "This is your last wish so really make this one count." The guys says "Well I've always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands." The Genie says "That is asking for quite a lot and I'm not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you'd want?" The guy says "Well I've been married and divorced three times, and I just can't understand what I've been doing wrong. I've given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says "Do you want a three or four lane highway?"