How do you sink an American battleship?
Have the French build it.
Stop making jokes about disabled people; they can’t stand up for themselves.
what's the difference between a feminist and a knife?
one has a point.
How do Asians name their kids?
They throw pots and pans down the stairs. (ching chong dong)
If you tell a girl they're pretty, they won't believe you. If you tell them they're ugly, they'll never forget it.
Elephants never forget.
My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."
Why does the queen move more than a king on the chessboard?
Because it looks like a kitchen floor.
What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.
What do you call a Muslim sleepover?
Osamas in Pajamas.
Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?
Because they're the ones who made the toys.
What do you call a group of white people running down a hill?
An avalanche.
A white dude walks up to a Muslim and says, "So you're an Indian?" and the Muslim says, "No brotha, I'm not 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11."
Q: What has two wings and a halo?
A: An Asian phone call, "Wing, Wing, Halo?"
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.
What do emo kids and bats have in common?
They both hang from trees.
The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.
I hate Russian dolls. They're so full of themselves.
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
How do you circumcise a redneck?
Kick his sister in the chin.
