Start jokes

Children and your meat are actually quite similar.

At first you seem weirded out by spanking it, but later on you start to enjoy it.

I'll start: Monokuma.

I was thinking of starting up a stair company, but there were too many steps to it.

I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

"Imagine being an orphan, could never be me," I say. For some reason, everyone started crying, then I walked out of Dave's orphanage.

What starts with F and ends with CK?

Firetruck.

Little Mickel was on a tree.

He fell down and hurt his knee.

He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.

I named my cousin's parrot Michell, and then I started to call Mikey "Mikey", right? I'm starting to teach my cousin Sammy how to say "Mikey Mikey" and he says "mekiy meiky" 😆

I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn’t know back-to-school sales had started already!

Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.

Abandon ship!

Night chat! Starts in 4 hours! Love Kenya! 😘

I searched on Google, "How to start a wildfire?"

I got 39,300,000 matches.

All terrorists like starting a new year off with a bang.

You ever look back at your ex and are like, "Wow! What was I thinking?"

Then I start to think I was the problem :(

Just kidding, fuck that asshole!

How are rape and airplanes similar?

The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.

Here's what to do if an annoying person keeps talking to you. First, ignore them until they ask you if you're going to respond. Then ask them: if they were walking down the street and a rabid dog suddenly started barking at them, would they get on all fours and bark back? After that, continue to ignore them.

Teacher: Tell me what's the solution of this equation? 30g + 24y + 15a - x^3 = 0

Student: 69 gay = xxx

Teacher: You're out!!!

Student lies down on the floor, and then teacher starts f...ing him ^_*

😂😂😂😂

"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."

The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/

In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.

Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."