Stand jokes
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
Lesbian stands for:
L: Loving
E: Extra
S: Shitty
B: Bitches
I: I
A: Am attracted to
N: Nice girls.
Why didn't Steven Hawkins get into fights?
'Cause he couldn't stand up for himself.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.
What does PEMDAS stand for?
Penis enters my dad and sister.
What does Trump stand for?
Trump Runs Underneath My Penis.
Why don't butts get along?
Because they can't stand each other's cheek!
What does the PH stand for in "orphan"?
People in wheelchairs should really stand up for themselves!
Teacher: "Stand up, class!"
She is sitting down.
Teacher: "Whoever stands up is stupid!"
Someone bullied a disabled person.
The disabled person said they can't stand it.
A guy in a wheelchair said, "I stand for Boris." But I think he meant he sat for Boris.
Gwen just wanted to help you with the bullying.
Tip 1. Ignore them; bullies are really just cowards.
Tip 2. Stand up for yourself; it's ok for people to also help you, but you do the same for yourself!
Tip 3. Just let them be; they're just stupid!
Love you-Iariah
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
Why couldn't the bicycle stand? It was two tired...
What are four ways a condom is like a Republican elephant?
1. It stands for inflation.
2. It limits production.
3. It encourages cooperation.
4. It gives you a feeling of security even though you know you're being screwed.
Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?
Because good rappers always stand out!
The duck walked up to the lemonade stand.
And he said to the man Running the stand, "Hey! Bomp bomp bomp Got any grapes?"
A little boy went to church. The priest said, "Get in the following positions: stand, then kneel, then bow." The little boy replies, "Can you hurry up and f**k me already?"
Julius's wife always stands behind him. Therefore, whenever he looks in the mirror, he sees her (Caesar).