Stand jokes
Why did the rapper sit on the stool?
Because he had too much FLOW to stand still!
I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:
Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?
Because he wanted grapes.
Stephen Hawking is a real stand up guy, out-standing performance.
Friend: If you don't like my bad jokes, I will tell some stand up comedy.
Me: But you are not standing:)
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
Memes
What does NASA stand for? 🍝🧇🍝🧇🍝
What does the F in orphan stand for?
FAMILY 😭😭
*IT'S DEPRESSING THIS PAGE EXISTS*
Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?
Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.
Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly.
What's the difference between Chaplin and a politician in a wheelchair?
Chaplin does stand-up comedy, and the politician does sit-down... comedy.
Who else liked the part in Morbius when he said his catchphrase "IT'S MORBIN' TIME" and MORBED over everyone? In my theater we had a standing ovation!
Stephen Hawking can't stand for army.
Why are so many people making fun of people with wheelchairs?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
After standing in line staring at McDonald's menu for 17 minutes,
Me: "Okay, I'm ready. Can you help me not be sad all the time?"
Are you a hotdog stand? 'Cause you make my hotdog stand ;)
Gwen, are you dead????? If not, I am Alya. Thanks for always standing up for me!!!!!!!!!!!
You know somebody has a fat ass when someone is standing between you and them, and all you can focus on is that trunk.
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
There’s this girl who gets bullied for being in a wheelchair.
Why don’t she stand up for herself?
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?